Affections
by SpatialNERD
Summary: Throwing drones out the airlock and bullying Shorters has long since lost their appeal to Red. He's grown bored and it's slowly driving him insane. Purple makes a suggestion and Red jumps on it, choosing an unlikely candidate for the position. RedxZim, OOC, M for potential sexual content and sensitive themes.


A/N this is more of a guilty pleasure fic for me since I really do enjoy some nice fluff between Red and a tiny Zim ;D;'' RedxZim is such an uncommon pairing and it pains me so. The grubs' species who appear here belong to me, as does Rural Irk

Also short chapter just to get things started off

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Red sighed softly and ran a hand over his antennas as he paced the control room. He was bored out of his mind. Previous activities such as throwing short drones out the airlock or bullying the pilots have long since lost their overall appeal, leaving him with very little to do. It made him envy those who didn't have an empire rule and actually had _things_ they could do. To be honest he missed the days when he could run off after training and explore and hang out with friends. Now his only friend was Purple, since anyone shorter than them practically worshiped the ground they floated over and would be either too terrified or too enthusiastic to be any fun.

A frustrated groan escaped him as he floated over to the railing that separated their raised platform from the pit where the pilots sat. A couple of them sent nervous glances in his direction when he rested his elbows on the rails and pressed a pair of knuckles to his lips in thought. Behind him there were a few soft chirps and the sound of Purple laughing. The violet Tallest was playing with his small hoard of grubs, which he had imported from a planet near Irk to be his pets. Red couldn't see the appeal in the squishy things. They only ever ate and slept and made annoying noises and couldn't even speak. To Red, they were utterly boring and hideous. Still, he couldn't help but to be a bit jealous of his co-Tallest. Purple at least had something to relieve his boredom. Red considered getting a pet just like him but after an hour of looking up different species he couldn't find one that seemed interesting enough. They all could only perform a few tricks that didn't interest him and none of them could fulfill his need for social interaction that didn't involve worship or over-eager drones. What he needed was something more….sentient. Something that he could actually speak to and get an intelligent response. He could always take his pick of a Vortian or screw head, but both held such deep contempt for the Empire that bringing one onto the Massive would likely result in utter chaos. Plus, Vortians only ever spoke of tech or rebellion. Screw heads reeked like blorch rat dung, too.

"Red! Look!" Purple chirped suddenly, distracting Red from his thoughts.

"What, Pu-eugh.." He turned and was greeted with a fat grub in his face. Purple must have gotten up without him realizing. The grub wiggled it's eight stubby legs and blinked its large green eyes at him. "Purple, get that thing away from me." He muttered and turned his back on his co-ruler.

"Aww, what's wrong?" Purple asked as he set the grub on his shoulder, and went to stand beside his friend.

"You know I don't like those things, Pur. They're hideous." Red sighed and leaned back on the railing. "Besides, you know I'm bored. I don't have twenty-five thousand squishy grubs like you do."

"I only have four and they are excellent company." His counterpart huffed and half-sat, half-leaned on the railing. "I've said it a million times. You should get a pet also. I know I'm much happier with my little grubbies crawling all over me."

"I've already looked. Nothing sparks my interest. Vorts are out of the question and don't even mention those reeking Screw Heads. I'm not as easily amused as you are, Pur. Plus, you could say that I'm a bit lonely on top of the boredom." He mumbled, making sure only his partner could hear and not the pilots.

Purple nodded and took a couple minutes to let this sink in before responding. "Then why not pick an Irken? I mean...they won't exactly be a pet, but it would be something, right? Plus, they would obey your every command and wouldn't put up a fuss, hopefully. Not to mention you have billions to pick from." He suggested.

"Pur, you're a genius!" Red shouted and slammed his cuffs against the rail, making most of the pilots jump and turn to stare at them. "An animal provides limited entertainment and can't even converse." He began and started pacing again, one knuckle pressed to his chin. "A vortian can be chaotic and talk nonstop about technology or how they're going to overthrow us or just how much they hate us. Planet Jackers….that would probably violate our treaty. I don't want Irk thrown into their sun. Screw Heads are just….ew. A Meekrob is completely and utterly out of the question. I don't even want to THINK about what they could possibly do to the Massive." The crimson Tallest stopped pacing and turned to look out the huge bay window that stretched across the front. "An Irken, though….An Irken can easily be programmed and they are almost always forever loyal. Not to mention they won't chatter away like a Vort or reek like a Screw." He laughed gleefully at the idea of finally finding something to relieve his boredom and went to flop down in the hover-chair that always sat on the bridge for him.

"Glad to see you excited about this...I guess.." Purple muttered warily, a bit creeped out by Red's sudden shift in behavior, and went to go sit in his own chair. "Who will you pick?"

"Hmmm…..Not just any Irken, that's for sure." Red said, looking up the ceiling in thought. "Someone who doesn't worship us, that's for sure. I don't want this person to just be a 'yes man', those guys are boring and we have enough of those on this ship. Someone who is a little wild would need some...eh...training."

"Red, who are you thinking of?" Purple asked, noticing the sudden gleam in his partner's eyes. "Please tell me-"

"A breeder would be nice, too." Red added. He knew full well that breeders were statistically rare, most of them being on Rural Irk, the little planet they took over near Irk and now use to farm sugar and other things for snacks. The others were hybrids and, very rarely, a pod born. Sadly, dark-skinned farmers were too rough around the edges and Hybrids weren't his thing. "We only know a handful of those, don't we, Pur?"

"Oh Irk, Red please-"

"Purple I do believe you know exactly who I am thinking of. I'm sure that with a little programming we can get the nastier defects taken care of or replaced with others….maybe." Red grinned as he stood from his chair and smoothed out his crimson skirt. "Now, if you excuse me I have preparations to make." He disappeared out the doors, a startling grin plastered on his face and leaving Purple clutching two of the four grubs in terror.

"Oh Irk, Read...you're going to kill us all." He whined, one of the smaller grubs butting her head against his cheek in comfort.


End file.
